COVID-19 Humanity Betrayal ㅤ Memory Project

It all started roughly around December 10,2021, when my mother started to get sick. That following week, I was going on a small vacation to Tennessee, but before I left I ran to the store and grabbed my mom Gatorade and a few things she needed, as she wasn’t feeling well. I even offered to cancel my trip in which she told me no she would be alright.  During my trip, we messaged and called each other.  She never was the type to say too much about how she was truly feeling with symptoms.

I returned the 16th and had gone down to check on her in person, and she was definitely sick.  I checked her vitals which were low.  Her oxygen saturation was 35 percent, and she finally told me she hadn’t urinated in a day. So, i turned her home oxygen up to 5, as high as it would go, and got it to come up some.  I got her into the shower in a shower chair as she claimed to have been weak, and hasn’t showered in a couple days.

We got her bath done, and I told her she was going to ER and she said “No, I will go tomorrow.”  I said, “No we’re going now. your oxygen is down too low, and you haven’t urinated.”  I got her in the car and continued her oxygen on her, and kept her oxygen monitor on her on the way.

We got to Fairfield Medical Center in Lancaster Ohio, and got her checked in.  They were concerned with everything, and got her back pretty quickly.  They ran tests in which one was COVID-19, and it came back positive.  They came in and told us [the results].  They wanted me to leave in which I replied, “No, it doesn’t matter, because I care for her and have been around her.

They admitted her and I had to leave. I contacted through MyChart, her heart doctor at OSU, and explained what was going on since she had a Remodulin pump which required her to be admitted to OSU ICU because they’re the only ones besides my mother and I that knew how to make the pump function.

While at Fairfield Medical for the night, sometime during the night or the next morning, they gave her Remdesivir and other meds without our consent.  I went in the next morning which was December 17, 2021, and spoke to the doctors about her pump, her medical history and everything else.  They had put in request to have her transferred to OSU, and I wasn’t allowed to see her while I was there.

She ended up being transferred to OSU Medical Center in Columbus Ohio, on December 17, 2021.  Upon my arrival, my mother was in the ICU room.  When I walked up to door, after having to gown up and put on all proper PPE for COVID, she was lying in the bed with a blue like blanket over her, with all kinds of nurses around her.  My heart sank, and I feared the worst.  I kind of stood there in shock, and a nurse came up to me and said “You can come in if you don’t mind seeing this.”  I replied, “Is she okay?”  She said yes they were putting a pick line in threw her neck.  I stood outside the door until they were finished so I wasn’t in the way.

After they were done, I went in the room with her. We talked, cried and visited with each other until I had to leave at 7P.M.  I had to be tested for COVID, and I was told when I was leaving, I couldn’t come back to visit till the results came back. We were devastated and upset. But, I followed through with it.  Got the results and came back everyday to visit.

During her first 2-2 1/2 weeks they didn’t bathe her for 16 days.  Her room wasn’t cleaned properly, blood was left on her bedside table, floors wasn’t swept or mopped, room wasn’t wiped down or sanitized.  I was upset, and said something and still, nothing was done.  I went above to higher up, and finally she got a sponge bath, the house keeper came in and cleaned half-assed!

We also realized they were giving her Remdesivir, so I called the doctor in and told them we weren’t asked before they gave that to her, and we didn’t want her having it since we had heard nothing but bad from it.  He insisted it was what was best for her and that was that.  He also stated to me, “I need to prepared myself for the worst.”  I finished my visit with my mom and when I got out into parking I broke down crying.

The doctor and nurse also stated to me around the 2 week mark that my mother had exceeded her stay. How do you exceed your stay in a hospital when you’re definitely sick?

I continued to show up every day until I got sick, and had to stay home a couple days.  My mom would message me, and tell me how she would sleep with one eye open, or she would wake up before a nurse even made it through her door because she didn’t trust them.  One nurse had picked at her pump inserted in her belly until one night she finally pulled it out.  Another nurse would always mess with her oxygen on her face till my mother told her, “Don’t touch my face.  I can adjust it if needs adjustment.”

My mother would also message me or video call when I wasn’t visiting as visiting hours were till 7P.M., and then I had to leave. During many times talking with her, she would ask me to bring her something to eat as she was starving.  They put her on a diet, and would only get her certain things.  Almost every time she would page and ask for water or ice, it would take them hours and she had to go without. It got to the point she wouldn’t bother them because they would get an attitude, or as I said, not come for hours.  I constantly brought her food and drinks, or I would go get her something while I was there to make sure she had something to eat.  I also brought in many snacks, so she would have them when I wasn’t there.

On January 13,2022, they called my brother and I in for a meeting with my mom and different doctors.  During the meeting, they talked how my mother wasn’t doing the best, and didn’t think she would survive this.  They were insisting on us sending her to LTACH and to start taking her off her oxygen and Remodulin.  I stated, “NO!” because she was on oxygen and Remodulin at home, and I felt as though I was killing my mother [if they took her off].

They still sent LTACH a letter in which LTACH denied her admittance due to the cost of medication. They even tried to say maybe she can pay for her own meds. We again stated no, and that if things worsened, she would stay there due to the need of the high oxygen.  (They had her on Heated flow vent, which no one could administer that amount to her, nor did we have that at home.

At one point my mother even looked at the doctor and asked him “Do you see death in my eyes or something”?  To which he replied, “No, I like to be close and look you in the eyes so you can hear me.”  Which she didn’t believe.  After the meeting was finished, we called the grand kids and only two (2) of them could come.  They came, and got to visit with her for a hour. Remind you during, her whole time in hospital, she was only allowed one (1) visitor.

My mother stated, “She wasn’t going to die that day because she didn’t like the 13th.”  She stayed awake all day.  I was there till 7P.M., with her.  After the visit with the grand kids, she asked me to lay in bed with her ,and we took pics and talked and cried.  She voiced her concerns to me and everything.

I continued to visit everyday. I went up on January 16,2022  but was only there a couple hours as ice storm was moving in. I took her KFC and she ate her small bowl of mashed potatoes and mac & cheese. I left her chili soup so she had for the next day because I wasn’t sure I was going to make it up depending on how bad the roads got. But before I left the doctor came in and had asked me if I was staying, I said I’m not allowed to stay you had told me, he said no I mean are you staying close by, I said no I have children at home I have to get too, I live like a hour and 15 mins away. Which seemed kind of odd to me. But I finished my visit gave my mom a kiss and hug and left. We talked on my way home as the roads were horrible and it took me hours getting home.

January 17,2022, I was up and messaging my mom from 7A.M. to 9A.M.  She stated in one message that “she was feeling better and was going to eat her chili that I left her in little bit.”   We were also talking about the snow and how horrible it was out.  I fell back asleep and got awakened up to a phone call at 10:16A.M., from the hospital stating my mother was asking to be comforted. My heart sank and I started crying and said, “NO!”

They put my mom on phone in which she sounded out of breath, and she said, “I love you.”  I said, “No, momma, I’m on my way.”  To which she replied, “I can’t.  I love you.”  I said, “No momma, I love you, just wait.  I’m on my way.”  Then the doctor got on phone and hung up.

I called my brother and told him, and then called my father and had him on speaker as I was getting dressed.  Next thing I know, I had a call beeping in that said, ” MOM.”  I told my dad I had to go mom was calling. I answered, and it was the doctor on my moms phone asking if there was a brother, and I said yes.  They asked if I could call him, so I three-way called my brother, and they put my mom back on phone.  She told my brother she loved him, and he stated, “If this is what you want mom, I love you.”

I was crying, and told her I loved her again and she stated she loved us all.  The phone hung up, and I was devastated!  I got to the hospital and my mother was laying there drugged up. They were giving her Ativan and morphine every 10-15 minutes.  The nurse said, “I left her oxygen on because I heard you say you were coming.  My mother’s oxygen was hanging half off.

I called my brother and showed him in which he said, “Sis, mom didn’t want to suffer tell them take the oxygen off.”  I replied, “I can’t.”  So, he told the nurse as I’m sitting there beside my mother.  The nurse came over, and I told her I wasn’t ready, to give me ten more minutes, but she continued to remove the oxygen mask, and I lost it. I looked up at the monitor and my mother’s oxygen level went up to 83 percent.  The nurse hit the monitor, and told me I didn’t need to see that.

She walked behind me and had given my mother a shot, and sat the empty vile on the desk by the computer, and she walked out.  (I didn’t know, but my boyfriend had seen her,  and he took picture of vile, and he told me after we got home, and I calmed down some.)

I was laying there holding my mother and a tear ran out her right eye down her cheek, as she took her last breath.  She died within 3-5 minutes after that nurse gave my mother that shot and walked out.  Three nurses/doctor walked in like they had it timed.  I asked if she was gone, and the doctor came over and listened and said, “I’m sorry.”

I stayed for hour and half signing papers, having her finger print done, gathering up her belongings and I left.  As we drove about block down road, I tried to sign into my mother’s MyChart, and they had all ready shut it down.  When we got home, my boyfriend told me about that shot and he showed me the picture he had taken of the vile.  We searched it [on the internet] and it came up “lethelization,” which is used to shut down organs!

I also want to state during my mom’s time admitted to the hospital, she was asked several times about a DNR. They asked about being vaccinated, and they informed her, if she “made it out alive,” she had to get the vaccine. The doctors even stated in notes, they had on proper PPE, and assisted her within in 6 feet. They also asked many times about putting her on the vent, and she refused!  They claimed many times, due to her refusing to be put on vent or have lung transplant, there was nothing else they could do for her.