COVID-19 Humanity Betrayal ㅤ Memory Project

My mom was diagnosed with stage 3, almost 4, colorectal cancer in 1999. She immediately sought treatment at Duke University’s Hospital and by the grace of God, she was declared cancer free after a fierce battle, a little over a year later. After a recurrence of uterine cancer that required surgery, but no treatment about 10 years later, mom’s cancer returned in the form of Lymphoma in 2015. I share all this to say that my mom was a medical anomaly, a fighter and a survivor. A devout Catholic her entire life, she turned to her beloved Padre Pio at times of desperation.

It was because of her Lymphoma, which had been dormant since 2019, that my immediate family made the decision to get the vaccine because my mom couldn’t and wouldn’t. She did not make that decision lightly, but knew in her heart it was the best decision for her. Her immune system was severely compromised from cancer and treatments that she felt any adverse reaction to the unproven vaccine would do her in. My husband, my father and myself chose to get the vaccine when it became available because we weighed the risks and felt that if it truly prevented COVID, we wouldn’t bring it to mom.

Ultimately we learned the hard way that the vaccines offered no protection against contracting and spreading COVID. In July 2021, all of us, including mom, began getting sick at the start of the “breakthrough cases” after spending a week together. Mom and me first, followed by my dad, my husband and then my 2
year old son. My family had just returned to Atlanta and my parents to the Florida panhandle.

Mom was our main concern, but seemed to be doing well. She took an at home test which initially came back negative. Still feeling under the weather, she took another test the next day and it was positive, so we prepared with Vitamin D, C and Zinc. I also called my primary doctor asking for guidance regarding treatment. I was offered none, just told to wait it out and if we had trouble breathing, go to the ER.

My mom never ran a fever, her oxygen was in the 90s and she had a very mild and infrequent cough. Just in case, I began trying to find Ivermectin and monoclonal antibodies. We always had a plan, I just don’t think we anticipated how hard it would be to find these items when we needed them. After 4 days, mom’s appetite waned and she became disoriented. I thought she was dehydrated so I suggested my dad take her to the ER to receive fluids and to see if they could administer the monoclonal antibodies.

While there, they discovered her oxygen was in the 80s, so they wanted to send her home with an oxygen tank, but they were out. They suggested we admit her to the hospital to get oxygen overnight, receive the antibodies because they did not administer in the ER and be released the next day. We agreed because it sounded reasonable. I called the cardiology unit at 4am to check and make sure she was in her room and comfortable. They told me she was and that she would get treatment in the morning. Thus began my routine phone calls checking in with the nurse after each shift change.

The nurses were always pleasant and answered my questions. Mom was not on their watchlist, I was told that she received the monoclonal antibodies (we later learned this wasn’t true) and was being given the Covid cocktail of vitamins and Remdesivir, which I questioned because we did not approve that medication, only Regeneron. They said it was protocol. After a few days though, I became concerned as to why mom hadn’t been released. My family headed to FL as soon as we were better and I immediately went to see mom. I couldn’t go into the room, she had been isolated since admittance, but I could see she was frail through the window.

The nurses weren’t as optimistic all of a sudden and told me that my mom wasn’t going to make it. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I asked them to stop the medicine they were giving her because her kidneys were in trouble and I suspected it was Remdesivir causing the issues. I begged for Ivermectin, I begged to release her. I asked why the monoclonal antibody treatment didn’t work and then was told that it wasn’t in her chart that she received them.

Her oncologist had been kept up to date on her hospital stay, but when I shared with him what I learned that night, he immediately called to get answers. Because he is a doctor at a private hospital, he did not have visiting rights where mom was admitted. He learned that mom was never administered the monoclonal antibodies even though I was told by her doctor that she received them (this was a few weeks before DeSantis opened up the sites throughout FL).

They found a bag and administered them to my mom, but it was three weeks later, well past the time it would have been effective. Since there was nothing more they could do, they discharged my mom to a respiratory rehabilitation center. I asked if they were discharging her to go to this place to die, but was told emphatically “No,” that mom had a chance. Mom was admitted to the respiratory rehabilitation center for what we anticipated being the road to healing. Instead, when my dad, my brother or myself arrived for our daily 6 hour visit with mom, we rarely encountered a nurse. We did see a respiratory therapist for a moment or two as they adjusted her oxygen, but they never gave us a clear idea of what was being done for her rehabilitation.

I wasn’t confident that mom was receiving the best care, it truly felt like she was being kept there until she passed. The second night she was there, I received a call from the nurse at 2am. I had spoken to her a few hours before, but now she wanted clarification on my mom’s DNR status. When mom was at the hospital, she was listed as DNR because she did not want to be ventilated if it came to that based on conversations she had with the doctor in the cardiology unit. When she was transferred to the rehab facility, she asked for the DNR to be reversed because she felt the will to live. She wanted to do everything she could to survive. But the facility was not happy with that decision, and it began a two day struggle of them asking my father to reverse back to a DNR.

The situation culminated with the doctor coming in during my dad’s visit with mom while the entire family, including 8 grandchildren were outside her window for a visit. He told mom that they didn’t want to have to break her ribs if she coded and they were forced to save her so she needed to reverse back to DNR. My mom kept asking if he
meant she was going to die and he coldly told her “that is up to God”. The nurse came in to intervene because she later told me that this doctor had an awful bedside manner.

But that was the moment we lost hope. The healthcare providers were not fighting for mom’s healing, they were more concerned with the hassle of saving her life if she needed them to. According to her health records, mom lost 30+ pounds in the 8 days she was under the care of the rehab facility. I inquired daily about her nutrition and was told that she was eating. Not understanding why she was still losing so much weight, I spoke to a nurse manager and was told that mom’s chart indicated she was eating 100% of her meals, including the untouched lunch tray I saw being removed from mom’s room the day before. I realized mom was starving and demanded a feeding tube which was delayed for another day. Her feeding tube was inserted on August 19th and she passed away on August 21st. The only solace I have is that my dad, my brother and myself were allowed to hold her hand while she drifted away.

I have no doubt that my mother is dead because of the misinformation we were told about the vaccine stopping the spread and the inability to access life saving drugs. If we had been allowed to remove her from the hospital or stop the administering of Remdesivir, she would have had a better chance than she was given. And I have no doubt that the negligence of the rehab facility led to the shutting down of her frail body. She received no sustenance for 8 days. No ability to fight the illness and the lack of strength to heal.

My mom was of the most vulnerable in our country that would have needed the best care and treatment in order to survive Covid. If our resources had been spent on protecting them, how many lives could have been saved? She was utterly failed by our healthcare system (and government) after fighting so long and so hard to survive three cancers over 21 years. She deserved better than what she received.

She left behind a husband, a son, daughter, a daughter-in-law, a son-in-law, 8 grandchildren, 2 sisters and numerous cousins, nieces and nephews and is missed dearly.